Shoes
As leaders we would like to be empathic and have compassion for our people, and yet we too are human. We do our best to listen and ask. Still, we can’t “get it right” 100% of the time. We have not walked in their shoes.
As leaders we would like to be empathic and have compassion for our people, and yet we too are human. We do our best to listen and ask. Still, we can’t “get it right” 100% of the time. We have not walked in their shoes.
Do you know your proxemics? Yup, there’s a word for it – the amount of distance you are comfortable with between yourself and others. The personal space necessary for you to feel at ease. Depending on culture, personal history, where you live, and age you may have a different perspective. You may not have given any thought to this, yet, this is important in making a comfortable work environment for everybody.
When you hear or read, do you spend more energy on how to understand or how to label the content? One way of determining if you are a leader is whether you listen more to learn or to judge. When your mind is trying to understand, it is open to all kinds of possibilities. You are trying to make connections with the new information to the information you already hold in your brain. This allows for many new pathways for the information to go. It’s the route of knowledge. If you are labeling, you are making a decision, often quickly, to dismiss new information or hold onto it. You are not processing for further use. While one is an open-door approach, the other is a closed-door approach. Which would you rather be – a leader or a judge?
Actions that bring good things often become habits. For instance morning affirmations, meditation or physical stretching. Habits that aren’t bringing you the good stuff, you try to let go of because they get in the way of your work success, better health and more fulfillment. How about group habits? Have you thought about ways of working at your company that have become an ingrained group practice but are getting in the way of the good stuff? One of those habits may be superficial thinking. Here’s an explanation and example of superficial thinking, and what you can do about it at your organization.
Although not an exclusive issue among young leaders, I’ve noticed a growing trend among younger professionals who make a conscious choice when reading, watching or hearing, to limit their view of information to a single moment, an emoji, or a phrase which forms a self-contained bubble. Skimming the surface, they then rush to make a judgement about it. Good, bad, right or wrong. And it becomes personal. Whoever said, wrote or did are good, bad, right or wrong. These young professionals are missing the big picture, perspective, and details. It is an incomplete view which potentially hurts their decision making, their team/department, and themselves. Does this sound familiar? Has this been impacting you, your company or team?
Surprised when those you share so much with disagree with your point? People you work with may not always be on your same wavelength. If you can apply your curiosity skills, you can ask and listen to their views about why your vision or opinion is not shared. And if you discover, they’re uncertain, you can be comfortable with uncertainty which is a great outcome because it means they are not stuck in an opinion.
For many generations in the U.S., showing up and being reliable has been an accepted practice of demonstrating respect for others. And it’s been a desirable quality to be the person that people can rely on. Yet, like so many things you may be questioning after the last few years, is this still relevant or have today’s influencers changed acceptable behavior? You can probably acknowledge norms and manners have been changing socially and professionally. So, even though Bruno Mars may have sung about this, do you question if younger professionals (who because of their numbers set the trends and standards) still care about being reliable?
Manners matter in a workplace that favors respect for everyone. Manners convey recognition and consideration. When certain manners are practiced in an organization and you follow them, you fit with the company culture. And, whether you accept it or not, you are communicating a lot about yourself and how you view yourself in the organization when you use manners or don’t use them with the people you work with. Yet, manners can be tricky because they are not the same from country to country or region to region even within the U.S. and they are constantly evolving and updating according to general practice of the times. With all these differences, how can you possibly figure out how to act in a respectful way in a workplace? Here are some tips…
Young professionals look for respect from their employers. From their boss, peers and company. Unlike prior generations, Millennials and Gen Z’s are vocal about asking for respect simply for being them, a unique individual who works at the same company. Respect having nothing to do with their seniority, experience or earning it. And, they will easily leave a position if they don’t see it being demonstrated, even if there is no job offer to escape to. Does that mean they show respect openly and easily to others they work with and their employer?
In the virtual example and in reality, when someone feels seen, they pass their pride and joy from that memory to others they interact with during the day so the good feelings spread. So, in recognizing a team member privately or a colleague, their appreciation for that approval works to spread positive emotions among colleagues, clients and team members they work with. A great number of people are then affected by a demonstration of recognition and approval for one person. Even if you may not identify with a desire to be recognized, many people do, particularly younger professionals. And, it could make the difference between holding onto a valued team member or giving them a reason to look for a new job.