Remember what it’s like to be 8-years-old at lunch in a school cafeteria? You see a kid who has a home-baked chocolate chip cookie. More than anything, you want that cookie, so you try to make a trade; your package of Sour Patch Kids for that cookie. The only thing is that the cookie owner doesn’t want to part with his freshly baked cookie. And, he says in his culture, there is only sweet candy. Therefore, he doesn’t want to make the trade. You’re 8; you can’t conceive of anybody not liking sour candy. And you want the cookie. How can you work with someone who does not share your tastes or a desire to exchange?

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A close friend of mine admits she’s more on the spectrum than the general population. Because of the special talents that come along with her unique gift, she has taught me valuable ways of looking at things. I bring this up in a blog about leadership because the members of your team with different ways of doing or seeing things can enhance how your team functions and can provide new perspectives, even possibly fun or joy. Here are the top five things I’ve learned through our friendship which will benefit you...

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Let’s rewind a little, have you ever sent or done something as a show of gratitude to someone who had never actually asked you for anything? When I show appreciation, I get personal. For instance, I sent soup because I was aware the person would greatly appreciate a good bowl more than perhaps anything else. And it was important and satisfying for me to let them know I cared about them and all they had done for me, and had been paying attention to what made them happy. People will remember a show of consideration far longer than a spoken or emailed “thank you.” And the recognition for your consideration in return is often respect, loyalty and more and better efforts.

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Are you prepared for fire? You’re a business leader. So, some of your fires, in addition to actual flames with heat, could include threats of violence or harassment within or outside the business, cybersecurity breaches or product defects. These could possibly happen any time so while you may not 100% prepared, you can be ready. As you will read, like me, you can do this. Here are some tips.

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Perhaps like me, you’ve had people who have tried to discourage you in your career. Or, you have had second thoughts about your career path. Despite that, if you are reading this, you persevered. The depth of coverage on the recent passing of monumental females left me feeling particularly curious about the timing behind a current Elle magazine article shaming women who dare to have ambition and dreams. The Elle article invited me to write a response; a piece that challenges this fashionable trend and celebrates ambition and dreams. Does groundbreaker describe your dream?

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When you hear or read, do you spend more energy on how to understand or how to label the content? One way of determining if you are a leader is whether you listen more to learn or to judge. When your mind is trying to understand, it is open to all kinds of possibilities. You are trying to make connections with the new information to the information you already hold in your brain. This allows for many new pathways for the information to go. It’s the route of knowledge. If you are labeling, you are making a decision, often quickly, to dismiss new information or hold onto it. You are not processing for further use. While one is an open-door approach, the other is a closed-door approach. Which would you rather be – a leader or a judge?

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Although not an exclusive issue among young leaders, I’ve noticed a growing trend among younger professionals who make a conscious choice when reading, watching or hearing, to limit their view of information to a single moment, an emoji, or a phrase which forms a self-contained bubble. Skimming the surface, they then rush to make a judgement about it. Good, bad, right or wrong. And it becomes personal. Whoever said, wrote or did are good, bad, right or wrong. These young professionals are missing the big picture, perspective, and details. It is an incomplete view which potentially hurts their decision making, their team/department, and themselves. Does this sound familiar? Has this been impacting you, your company or team?

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Do you see a thread here? A thread of opportunities, like mine, where you were elected, promoted, or saw a chance to inspire a group of people around a goal or cause. It was obvious to everyone else that you had definite leadership qualities and the presence of a leader, yet you may not have seen it or felt it for a long time. You never laid claim to having leadership skills. It was just something you did.

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Surprised when those you share so much with disagree with your point? People you work with may not always be on your same wavelength. If you can apply your curiosity skills, you can ask and listen to their views about why your vision or opinion is not shared. And if you discover, they're uncertain, you can be comfortable with uncertainty which is a great outcome because it means they are not stuck in an opinion.

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Manners matter in a workplace that favors respect for everyone. Manners convey recognition and consideration. When certain manners are practiced in an organization and you follow them, you fit with the company culture. And, whether you accept it or not, you are communicating a lot about yourself and how you view yourself in the organization when you use manners or don’t use them with the people you work with. Yet, manners can be tricky because they are not the same from country to country or region to region even within the U.S. and they are constantly evolving and updating according to general practice of the times. With all these differences, how can you possibly figure out how to act in a respectful way in a workplace? Here are some tips...

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